Hey, Spam.
I'm sending you this because you haven't been answering my calls.
I really did think it was going to be different, I know life up there must be hectic and oh-so luxurious, but it feels like you're ignoring me on purpose.
By this point any updates I get of my own brother are through tabloids and rumors. And trust me, they've been talking.
I just don't understand why, after everything I did for you, and after our promise, you would just pack your bags and leave me in the dump never to be seen again.
I'm barely getting by, Spamton. While you're up there rubbing shoulders with the Queen and her posse.
But I want to believe that somehow, this is a misunderstanding.
I'll go to the mansion and visit you exactly a week from now.
If somehow you still care, tell that lovebird of yours to expect me at the gates.
See you soon.